Excuse me.

Sometimes I drift from my original intentions of this blog. The title (in your natural habitat), as some may remember, referred to stupid people in their natural habitat. You may recall this from my story of a crazy patchwork-patterned-pantsed man who frolicked across Michigan avenue. If not, look it up.

Now I'd like to share with you a story.

The funniest thing I heard yesterday was this phrase: "excuse me."

On its own, it isn't a particularly funny phrase, but in the context, it was.

I was standing in a very crowded Urban Outfitters in the front of the store near a display of wacky gifts and books. After looking at some books at one table (One was the Snuggie Sutra about getting intimate under your favorite sleeved blanket) I moved on to the table of assorted novelties, which included test tube shot glasses, color-your-own piggy banks and a Fischer Price plastic record player. As I flipped through a Star Wars flipbook, a 20-something man behind me said "excuse me."

He was reaching for a hamburger phone next to me, mounted atop a pyramid of boxes of the Juno prop.

What really got me was that this man could not wait. He could not bear one more second of me standing between him and his beloved hamburger phone. It was all too urgent that I step aside as he reached for this communication device to show his mom/his friend/his brother. He needed it right then and there. No, he did not say "excuse me, I REALLY need to look at this hamburger phone while you browse through that sci-fi flip book. I cannot feign interest in this "12 days of Christmas drinking games" kit as you inadvertently block me from this desired hunk of junk-food shaped plastic speaker."

But he did. It was all implied in the tone of "excuse me."


http://www.urbanoutfitters.com/urban/catalog/productdetail.jsp?id=15259492&itemdescription=true&navAction=jump